I thought of you and closed my eyes and prayed to God today I asked what makes a mother and I know I heard him say; A mother has a baby, this we know is true

But God can you be a mother when you're baby is not with you?

Yes, yes you can, he replied with confidence in his voice I give many women babies, when they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime and others for a day And some I send to feel your womb but there's no need to stay.

I just don't understand this God I want my baby here He took a deep breath and cleared His throat and then I saw a tear "I wish I could show you what your child is doing today and if you could see your child smile with other children and say "We go to earth to learn our lessons of love and life and fear.

My mommy loved me oh so much I got to come straight here.

I feel so lucky to have a mom

Who had so much love for me, I learned my lessons very quickly My mommy set me free.

I miss my mommy oh so much but I visit her each day.

When she goes to sleep, on her pillow's where I lay.

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek and whisper in her ear, Mommy don't be sad today, I'm your baby and I'm still here...

So you see my dear sweet one,
Your children are ok
Your babies are here in My home and This is where they'll stay.

They'll wait for you with Me until your lessons are through And on the day that you come Home they'll be at the gates for you

So now you see what makes a Mother, it's the feeling in your heart
It's the love you had so much of right from the very start
Though some on Earth may not realize until their time is done
Remember all the love you have and know that you are a Special mom

Halyn's Memorial

There will be a candle light memorial for Halyn on December 18.

letter to my little lost one

Dear Halyn:

I am sorry it took me so long to give you a name. It's not that I wasn't thinking about you. Trust me I am. You are always on my mind.

I didn't relize how much you ment to me, or how much I would miss you. We didn't have much time together, but losing you has created a void within me that I don't know how to fill.

I wish we had more time together.

Love, Mom

I moved ....

About my life with Saeid is now posted at

http://saeidsucks.blogspot.com/